“What?! Why didn’t you tell me? You’re too young!” I do my best to assure parents that these crushes are a normal step in middle school development. Parents are usually shocked by that smile if they stay in the exam room. Often, though, I can tell from their smile. I take a careful study of their facial expressions, body language, and what they say or don’t say. Then I make a determination whether to continue the discussion or put it off for the next visit. It’s my job to gently broach the subject without making the child feel uncomfortable.
Also, crushes are often at the heart of real tween problems-early sexual exploration, bullying, exploitation, anxiety and depression. Why do I do that? Because asking the question opens the door to important sex talks that I want to have with my teen patients. Ask the Expert: What Age Should Teenagers Start Dating?Īs a family doctor, I ask kids about crushes.
